Ok, so you’re struggling with ADHD. Or, maybe you are just struggling and don’t know why yet. Either way it’s not a fun time. It’s effecting you at work, school, and even your relationships. And it usually feels worse that all you feel are the expectations of others but they don’t see the effort you’re already putting in to try and meet those expectations.
Your brain functions differently than folks who don’t have these struggles. That difference isn’t bad, it just adds a bit of flavor to your thinking and how you approach, well, everything. A little bit of spice. You’ve entered into being nuerospicy.
There’s a reason that the struggle feels so uphill. It’s not about having ADHD. It’s not even about having a formal diagnosis.
I’m sure you’re asking now, if it’s not about the diagnosis or the ADHD, what is it about?
The struggle comes from putting in effort without the proper foundation to focus those efforts to let you thrive.
The 8DHD program helps you understand the eight strengths, eight essential skills, and eight essential goals needed to thrive with ADHD. But, the whole program and everything that you get from it has a foundation built on three pillars. I’m going to share them with you so you can start to build your foundation to thrive.
First Pillar: Know Yourself
The first pillar acts as the cornerstone of the foundation, which is also the largest. This is where the most growth occurs that allows you to thrive.
Everyone thinks they already know themselves well, but the truth is, few of us truly do. We are masters of lying to ourselves. And it can be scary or painful to be honest, at first anyway.
The more work you put into knowing yourself, the more freeing it becomes.
This work involves metacognition (thinking about thinking), mindset work, skill building, and more. It’s where the journey from struggling to thriving truly starts.
Of course it can be easy to dismiss this type of work and have the desire to just rely on medication(s). The problem is that not everyone responds the same way. And as we’ve seen in the last few years, medication supply is not as reliable as we once believed. This makes it even more essential to have the skills and tools to manage ADHD both with and without pharmaceutical support.
In 2010, a pilot study showed metacognitive interventions helped manage ADHD symptoms between 30-40% compared to a 12% reduction from traditional support methods. You can read about it HERE.
An advantage of working with a Board Certified Nurse Coach is the education and information is evidence based.
Second Pillar: Accountability
I know what you’re going to say, “I’ll be accountable to myself”. And to that I say BS! If that were true you wouldn’t still be reading. I wouldn’t have a job. This whole piece wouldn’t have needed to be written in the first place.
But, because we all lie to ourselves, anyone who wants to move forward and thrive needs a source of accountability. Another person to keep us moving forward. Everybody does better with an accountabilabuddy.
This is why techniques like body doubling can be effective. Just having another person present in the room so you stay focused on your own task. With someone else present you’re working independently, but not alone.
That journal prompt you promised yourself you would do later gets done when you know you have to answer to someone else. You actually show up at the gym to do your workouts when there is someone there waiting on you.
The daily mindfulness goals you set for yourself are more likely to turn into habits if you’re reporting on your achievements.
It's usually best to be accountable to someone who isn’t too close to you. Without clear boundaries and open communication already in place, relying on family or a significant other can lead to feelings of judgment, resentment, and anger. This can harm relationships even if the intentions are good.
Using a neutral third party like a coach is highly beneficial. Additionally, because there is personal and financial buy in, the stakes are higher. Higher stakes help at a psychological level: the higher the stakes, the higher the level of accountability, and the bigger the benefit.
Third Pillar: Resilience
The work that gets put into knowing yourself from the first pillar and the fortitude and indomitable spirit that builds from being accountable builds resilience.
So what is resilience? It’s your ability to withstand difficulties and continue to move forward regardless of adversity.
The truth is, being neurospicy, you’re already more resilient than those who aren’t. You’re primed for it.
Resilience isn’t a personality trait or something you're born with. It’s a learned skill that gets honed by overcoming barriers and difficulties. When you're neurospicy, there are barriers to completing basic tasks - almost everything is more difficult. You’re constantly operating at a level of effort several times higher than someone not battling their own brain.
Imagine if someone who, on an average day, can complete all tasks without distraction, hyper awareness of their body or thoughts, or difficulty with words and numbers suddenly got dropped into your brain for a day. They would probably panic and not know how to function. For you, it’s just another day ending in “Y” because now these things aren’t even barriers, it’s your normal. You are already primed to adapt and overcome more than you realize.
That’s a heightened base level of resilience and it only grows from there. The more challenges you take on, the more you learn to overcome, the more resilient you become.
Build Your Foundation
When you have put in the work to build the first pillar and truly know yourself, found the person or group to keep you accountable to build your second pillar, you will find the third pillar builds on its own as your resilience grows with your knowledge and accountability.
This is the foundation to thrive with ADHD and the 8DHD program. To understand the 8 strengths of ADHD, master the 8 essential skills, and achieve the 8 essential goals starts with these three pillars.
Join me June 4th from 7-8pm for a live discussion with Lynne Fuller of College Flight Path where you can learn about the three pillars of the 8DHD program and how they can help you thrive. You can register for this free event here.
If you're ready to start thriving today, schedule a free discovery call now.